THE LOLLIPOP SHOPPE- JUST COLOUR

Heard this for the first time the other day and oof... this is what garage rock should sound like. Dripping with fuzz and stoned-angst while being sung by someone who can scream like a banshee as well as seduce you with a haunting croon. Oddly enough, the singer for this here band is none other than Fred Cole of Dead Moon! Cool hey! Guy is in obscure one-and-done sixties garage band then goes on to form one of the most prolific and well-loved garage/punk/DIY bands of all time! Not that I'm saying Dead Moon are on everyone's shelf or anything but I've never met someone that didn't like 'em!

Anyway, lot's of goodness here. Great guitar playing, songs, jams and singing. Cole sounds fantastic too! Shades of what was to come with Dead Moon but also a singing style that at times sounds like Greg Sage... probably just a wee lad in Portland at the time but clearly he heard this before he started the Wipers.

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CRAIN- SPEED

Post-hardcore from Kentucky in the early 90's. Nothing more, nothing less. If you like Shellac then you'll dig it. Fierce drumming

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THE GOSLINGS- GRANDEUR OF HAIR

Today I went to my city's urban-center to buy some books my folks wanted for christmas. Aside from scoring a copy of Daniel Johnston's art-book for twenty bucks as well as the stuff I was looking for, it was pure hell. Masses of people all shuffling around, no one smiling, people shoving into other people while saying "excuse me" under their breath and not bothering to make eye contact, eyeing that bluray Friends boxset they can't wait to get their greasy little mitts on (sorry Grace!)... this time of year really does suck.

In a rare and unfortunate occurrence, I had no tunes to drown out the frenzy of "should I get an I-phone or a blackberry" but I kept thinking of this album for some reason. Maybe because it's some of the ugliest, sludgiest, creepo doom/drone I've ever heard and the thought of it blasting over some loudspeaker, thus making everyone in the store feel like jumping off of a bridge was very satisfying to me... ahhh the holidays. Anyway, The Goslings are from Florida, record all of their albums on cassette and never tour... sounds kinda douchey and hey, maybe they are but when the music is this perfect, I could care less. Imagine a not boring, more psychedelic Sunn O))) and you'll have a pretty good idea of what you're getting into.

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BEVIL WEB/3 DREAM BAG- SPLIT 7"

Oh yes, I just bought a copy of this gem from the guy who used to run the label back in '94! It's being mailed straight from Dayton, Ohio! To keep it short, this is a split 7" between two "bands" who's members are all just people from Guided by Voices. Curiously, Bob Pollard is absent from this entirely but it doesn't matter a bit. Side A, aka Bevil Web, is Tobin Sprout at his very best and side B, aka 3 Dream Bag, is material penned by Greg Demos... which is surprisingly great! If you're into golden era GBV or just lo-fi pop in general then get on this!

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SLOAN- ONE CHORD TO ANOTHER

If you're from Canada then you either a) don't like Sloan and have been forced to listen to them by every rock station and music-outlet in the country or b) really love Sloan and wish more people took the time to actually listen to their records! Obviously I'm a 'b'...

This is their third album and first big commercial album in Canada, probably because one of its singles went on to be a popular muchmusic video. Our national media has always supported this band and although those decisions often seem arbitrary (Nickelback anyone?) this is one of the few cases where the powers that be actually supported a bunch of really legit guys who just wanted to make power pop for ever and ever and ever and ever. If you like the sounds of Big Star filtered through some early 90's indie sensibilities then this is the ticket! Their previous outing, Twice Removed, is also phenomenal.

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BLACK FLAG- LOOSE NUT

I am posting this because I think it's still maligned as a shitty album by even some very serious fans but I am here to try and convince you otherwise! Now, Black Flag are great, obviously, but how long they stayed great is one of the most divisive arguments among fans. Me, I think this is it. This is truly the last great, yet awkward grasp at making a defining album that would cement the band's legacy.

Now obviously people consider Damaged or My War to be that defining album but hindsight is 20/20... I'm sure in 1984 when Ginn was writing this material that the notion of those albums going on to be anything more than blips on the radar was probably laughable and anyone who's read about Ginn knows that he loved the Grateful Dead way more than he ever liked punk... what came was a weird, boneheaded, proto-crossover album with some real tough sounding riffs and the usual awesomeness of 80's Rollins/Ginn. I guess he thought this would really push them to the next level. Instead it's really just the beginnings of their breakup. Why do people hate this album though? Because it sounds nothing like Black Flag! Maybe it's not as good as the classic material but hey, stop shitting on it. It sounds like a revelation when you listen to it after some of the later Bad Brains stuff...That is definitely not to say that on the right day, this album is exactly what you need! That day will likely involve a nice mixture of shitty weed, cheap beer, warm weather and a desire to not think at all...

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CASIOTONE FOR THE PAINFULLY ALONE- ANSWERING MACHINE MUSIC

This one is for my fellow wimps. If you like lo-fi pop songs that are sad as fuck then this is the shit. The one deterrent for a lot of people is this: the whole album is one shitty keyboard and one man who can barely sing. Why is it worthwhile? The caliber of songwriting here is incredible. The stories in these songs are so relatable and heartbreaking for anyone who's ever pined for someone who doesn't notice you, been dumped because you were an idiot or just felt like no matter what, you were going to die alone. Imagine GBV played by one guy in his room on a casio SK-1! Yeah, I know, "weak!" right? fuck off, I gots feelings and unfortunately Void doesn't really relate to all of them...

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NEIL YOUNG- AMERICAN STARS N' BARS

This is one of my favourite Neil Young albums and as far as I can tell, it's not really included in the cannon of his greatest albums. A damn shame really, as this is his best synthesis of country-balladry and drunken guitar-wailing. It was widely unavailable and fairly unknown for a long time because it was not transferred to CD or reissued after its 1977 release. Thankfully about eight years ago it was reissued alongside On the Beach and a few other not-so-greats...

Now people will tell you that On the Beach is his classic 'lost' album and the great minds over at pitchfork gave it a 9.5 rating, which didn't help the throngs of hipsters who immediately decided it was their faaaavourite Neil Young album... well those people don't know After the Gold Rush from Trans, maaaannnnn! This is the shit, trust me. Country-fried bummer jams for the weary soul. Tear in your beer shit

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THE WIPERS- FOLLOW BLIND

I know, I know. "only the first three Wipers albums are good!"... whatever. People who only like the first three records are like people who think 'TV Party' is Black Flag's best song. The Wipers first three records all sound different, have no significant similarities in the songwriting and I will never understand why people like to lump them together as the only good records the band ever made. Don't get me wrong, I adore Is This Real? and Over the Edge but the fourth, fifth and sixth records are actually more cohesive than Youth of America, an album marred by uneven songwriting yet consistently adored by people... definitely something wrong with me!

On to this gem. Follow Blind is the band's sixth album and boy, is this some sad, subdued and spooky shit. Sage definitely tones down the distortion and rage on this one and goes for a more introspective/DEPRESSED theme. His guitar playing really carries this one, whammy bar in full effect for those nice subtle dives... this is a perfect record for those days when you wake up and realize that no matter what you do that day, nothing will make you happy!

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ULVER- BERGTATT

Do you like Black Metal? There are two kinds of hipsters I often notice. Those who are unconsciously apolitical, buy everything aside from food at urban outfitters, exclusively listen to whatever currently occupies pitchfork's 'best new music' and go to more fashion blogs than music blogs. On the other side of the coin are hipsters who are very political (whether or not they know what they're talking about is irrelevant now,) try very hard to be weird in ominous ways (ironically dress like 90's goths, listen to Death in June or other bands that are of dubious morals,) post weird pictures on tumblr of suburban kids in knockoff Nike shirts that were taken with digital cameras made in 2001 and oh yeah... LISTEN TO BLACK METAL!

Sorry to all you kvlt bros out there but black metal has, for a long time now, been co-opted by hipsters and has officially become part of the how-to-be-instantly-cool cannon. Who is to blame? Vice and the internet obviously, but lets look at black metal itself...

Political? sure! it largely became prominent when it was the music genre of choice for young Norwegians eager to destroy the philosophical and moral tyranny that christianity had imposed on their country centuries before. Let's see... try very hard to be weird in an ominous way? wearing melted Kiss makeup and never smiling? sounds about right, and never mind listening to music of dubious morals, lots of black metal bands are just openly racist... to make the comparison easier, of course. Lastly, wanna know a good place to find weird, grainy photos? tumblr? No, try black metal album covers. Sorry to anyone still clinging to the idea that listening to black metal made you any kind of an individual that was immune to trend and culture...

But hey, it's fuckin' good music! Like this record from Ulver. Black metal meets pastoral goth-rock in the early 90's... yes please!

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GUIDED BY VOICES- TONICS AND TWISTED CHASERS

Guided by Voices are my favourite band. I'm a sucker for good pop songs and Bob/Toby are my Lennon/McCartney. As a nice favor to their fans, they basically write and record at least two albums worth of material every year. One release that never gets attention as an official LP despite it's 20+ tracklisting of all original recordings, is this gem. Honestly, this is as good as the golden-era LP's and if you haven't heard it yet, you must check it out for 'Dayton Ohio 19 something and 5" alone.

This is the sound of summers gone by, walking home stoned at 3am on a breezy august night and being too dumb to appreciate how great it'll all be when you're old and sad

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NIGHTSTICK JUSTICE- CLAUSTROPHOBIC

This is a hardcore record. Describing it beyond the fact that it is pissed off, catchy, loud and well recorded is pointless, as I'm sure this is on a thousand blogs already but maybe you haven't been to those blogs. If you like Infest or Youth of Today then you should like this... I guess...

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RAW POWER- SCREAMS FROM THE GUTTER

I'm listening to this for the first time. Always dug the Wop Hour 7"(FYI they are Italian)... Anyway, this is blazing, heavy, bordering-on-crossover hardcore with very Japanese HC style vocals... oh yeah! there are solos and lots of random lead bits. Hardcore with shredding? yes please! Punk as nails, as they say... they being you? I dunno, is this a blog? fuck...

Look, this is really good hardcore and the album cover alone is worth it just to look at while you listen

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PUSSY GALORE- GROOVY HATE FUCK

Jon Spencer, Neil Haggerty. Blues Explosion. Royal Trux... Even though for all intensive purposes this is Spencer's band, this is the blueprint for everything Haggerty would go on to do. i.e. music that kind of sucks but is labeled as cool and/or interesting so you MUST love it.

This is a whole lot of pretentious bullshit by assholes who likely had no idea what they were doing or at the very least, could fake being awful. Now don't get me wrong, this is raw, hateful, steeped in a love of rock n' roll and all that but It's just such pretentious music. Four douchebags in Rolling Stones t-shirts walk into a bar... PUSSY GALORE! Cool music for people who care about cool music

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PAVEMENT- SLANTED & ENCHANTED B-SIDES

Last night among drunken ramblings between me and a friend were Tobin Sprout rarities, New Order vs. Joy Division and the fact that my friend loves Pavement and hasn't heard the bonus material that came with the Slanted & Enchanted reissue. Thinking about it, I suppose a lot of people probably haven't bothered to go beyond the album, which is a damn shame because Pavement really had something magical going on those first few years. The bonus tracks on that reissue rival the album and these days I probably listen to them more than anything else the band ever did. This is just the bonus disc but there's also some great shit on the first disc as well. Sorry if you're among the many who hate this band

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DRIVE LIKE JEHU- YANK CRIME

It just occurred to me that I have not listened to this album in at least three years and that I have not seen this on any of the blogs I frequent... so here it is for you!

Drive Like Jehu were a band from San Diego. If you've ever been there, you know it's boring as shit but somehow manages stay that way despite being so close to one of America's more culturally significant areas. Yet in the early 90's it was a fertile place for music with the scene surrounding Gravity records and powerviolence happening all around socal, so I guess it isn't too surprising that the area spawned this band... but seriously, if you're ever there just try and imagine being inspired...

Jehu featured the guitar talents of John Reis and Rick Froberg and oh boy their list of credentials is impressive (Hot Snakes, The Night Marchers, The Sultans, Obits, Pitchfork and Rocket From the Crypt)... this was their first band following the breakup of Pitchfork and this music is just a more-focused and, frankly, better version of that band. Lots of extended jamming that never gets boring or needless, incredible riffs, amazing vocals and such a strange sense of melody. Definitely falls into the post-hardcore category but still a record that stands out from the rest of that genre. Definitely a guitar record

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FASTBACKS- THE QUESTION IS NO

Chunky guitars. Catchy pop songs. Female vocal-harmonies... this is a goody

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BILL HICKS- RANT IN E-MINOR

Do you like to laugh? Do you find the government to be of dubious intent? Do you think the majority of people are stupid and laughing at them is sometimes the only way to make yourself feel better when you realize that these same idiots are the ones who allow this fucked society to continue running and functioning because they care more about having a better TV than living in a better world? me too...

Bill Hicks was a great comedian and an inspiring thinker when it came to politics. His cynicism knows no bounds and that's the way I like it. So, for a change, here's some standup

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MELVINS- (LYSOL)

While on the sludgy tip, let's give a nod to the masters. The monotony of Gluey Porch Treatments' endless sludge, The brevity and dynamics toyed with on OZMA and the synthesis of those qualities that resulted in the perfection that was Bullhead. Where does a band go when, in the minds of fans, they've made a perfect record? well, the answer turned out to be going where no one expected. Starting off your eagerly anticipated follow up with a nearly 20-minute two-song suite centered around two very slow and basic riffs, following that with a Flipper cover, two Alice Cooper covers and then an oddly haunting song to end things on a weird note... not exactly Who's Next. I hated this record the first time I heard it, waited a few years and hey! It's now great! If you're new to the Melvins I recommend the aforementioned Bullhead or the follow up to this, Houdini. Stay away from recent efforts

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DYSTOPIA- SELF TITLED

This record is the ultimate in filthy, harrowing and disgusting hatred/depression. Those two emotions are the ones chiefly at play here and Dystopia have mastered them like no one else. Musically this is super depressing sludge, a la Grief, clashing head on with Disfear. Now sure, that doesn't sound entirely compelling but the song structures, riffs, shared vocals and use of samples really make this stand out from other bands who wander the same sonic wasteland. Another thing going for this band is their mastery of tension/release. The intro of 'Learning With Intent to Fail' demonstrates this quite wonderfully.

This is not one to play at parties or for a loved one... unless you are trying to send a message... one that says "you are all scum and nothing will be right in the universe until the human race has been eliminated entirely"

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THIN LIZZY- JAILBREAK

I'm tired and I won't go into any detail about this. All I'll say is that this record is probably better than you think it is. If you don't like guitars and feeling good then don't even bother.

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TEXAS IS THE REASON- DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE?

A melodic, 90's emo band named after a Misfits lyric... based on that sentence alone I guess you'll know if you're interested in this or not. These guys sound like Sunny Day Real Estate and are from the same era. They were kind of a next-big-thing band but as they were poised to start working on their first major-label album, they realized they just didn't want to be a band anymore. Too bad but hey, if the 90's had a surplus of anything, it was great emo bands. They also have a self-titled EP that's worth checking out

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THE RAYMOND BRAKE- PILES OF DIRTY WINTERS

Man. This is one of those records perfect for the days when it gets dark at 4:30. The Raymond Brake inhabited that wonderful North Carolina scene in the early 90's but never really achieved any of the notoriety bestowed upon Archers of Loaf or Polvo... or even other southeast acts such as Grifters, which is a damn shame. This is a fine record of alternate tunings, nice singing, varied songwriting and that perfect mix of depression and the boredom of geographic isolation. Musically these guys are basically a mix between the more melodic passages of Polvo and the anthemic qualities of Archers although there is enough variation in these songs that you never feel like they were just ripping off their buddies. Sadly, no one ever gave a shit and they called it quits. Their singer now plays indie-folk in San Francisco's Vetiver with dudes who wear fedoras... they are signed to the eternal source of new and exciting American music, Sub Pop... People change, I guess...

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BASTARD- WIND OF PAIN

This is one of the best hardcore records you will ever hear and in my opinion, the best one to ever come from Japan... Very Negative Approach styled vocals, super fast, great riffs and also decent production... because they didn't need to mask their generic songs and shitty singing with layers of static. I'm sure this record is old news to hardcore nerds but most people do not fall into that category.

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SPECIAL AGENT DALE COOPER- "DIANNE..." THE TWIN PEAKS TAPES

There is no music on this. This is completely as advertised. 40 tracks of Kyle MacLachlan's character from David Lynch's Twin Peaks recording case-updates for his FBI secretary Dianne. These are of no value to those who haven't seen the show or who don't enjoy these asides within the episodes but as the show's primary source of comic relief, they are great to have here, isolated like this. Coffee, traveling, existential philosophy, character observations, all delivered with that unmistakable Dale Cooper enthusiasm. Really, just a fun listen, nothing more.

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BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN- THE RIVER

I feel like this is not commonly mentioned alongside Born in The USA, Born to Run, Nebraska, Darkness, etc... A shame really, because this double LP boasts everything fantastic about the Boss and if you want an intro that strays from his more recognizable songs, which can sometimes cloud an attempt to discover an artist, this is perfect. Rockers, pop songs, ballads, story telling... this is classic Bruce and from 1980 so you know he was basically on top of his game when this was cut.

Now, I understand there may be a certain stigma among people who have yet to understand the Boss' appeal. Contributing factors could be;

-too much cheese (cheese is subjective but fair enough)

-very commercial (yes, this shit is catchy as hell)

-boomers worship this guy (two of the most vapid, consumer-zombie fifty-somethings I've ever met loved the Boss as well)

-hipsters, particularly the cutesy, beck-listening, marcel-dzama-loving, catcher-in-the-rye-reading variety, loooove the Boss (because they fetishize artistic authenticity and when it comes to discussion of Springsteen, that seems to be the subject of choice)

thus, the question is surely asked by the dude in the Cult Ritual shirt, with stick and pokes, skinny jeans, a septum piercing and an extensive knowledge of Death In June "Why the fuck do I want to listen to some cheesy ass, MOR bullshit, boomer, ironic-hipster loved dickhead who sings about cars, girls and small towns?"

Because this dickhead understands your emotions better than you ever will.

p.s. He wrote a song for the Ramones! Unfortunately, his label wouldn't let him give it to them because it was too good but hey, now you can't say Springsteen didn't get punk(s)

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GO BACK SNOWBALL- CALLING ZERO

Short and sweet: This is a side project featuring the joint songwriting of Bob Pollard and Mac McCaughan. 90's wet-dream much? Surprisingly, not really. The music here sounds very subdued for McCaughan and very polished for Pollard. Apparently they wrote the songs by mailing bits and pieces of the songs to each other until they were satisfied with the results. A cool concept and a nice record for this time of year but given the names associated, it could be a disappointment to those expecting anything that sounds like either of their band's music. The best indication I can give is that the cover art definitely suits this one.

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BLINK 182- CHESHIRE CAT

Pretentious fucks and ironic _____ers suck in equal measure. I may be both on some days but I still hold this band near and dear. It irks me to no end when either of the aforementioned types dismiss or 'love' this record and the band's early work. Go listen GISM or Girls you turds

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LOW THREAT PROFILE- S/T 7"

Powerviolence rules, ok? ok, now that we're clear on that, on to this hot little item. Featuring former members of Infest(!) No Comment(!) and Lack of Interest(!) So, if those names mean nothing to you then I would check out all those bands. Why? because they rip and dip like few can. If you're familiar with those acts then you are already salivating and thinking that this is too good to be true. Honestly, I think it's a fucking great record that adds a little bit of spit-shine in the production department that powerviolence usually lacks, which puts it on par with some of my favourite Infest recordings.

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SUGAR- COPPER BLUE

I'm officially on a Bob Mould kick, so here is some more from the master. Sugar formed a few years after Husker Du broke up, likely because Bob still wanted the band experience and had some amazing songs kicking around that didn't suit his 12-string acoustic. So, we get Copper Blue. This is so 90's, so poppy, so glossy and fuck me, so perfect. I love this album like few others. Awesome guitar playing and the drums are recorded to really punch through it all. To some this will definitely sound like just another 90's record but if you're into later Husker Du, this is just a more focused set of songs that sees Bob freed from the idea of writing songs that fit that band's mold and trying out some bigger hooks. Pop bliss

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