THE LOLLIPOP SHOPPE- JUST COLOUR

Heard this for the first time the other day and oof... this is what garage rock should sound like. Dripping with fuzz and stoned-angst while being sung by someone who can scream like a banshee as well as seduce you with a haunting croon. Oddly enough, the singer for this here band is none other than Fred Cole of Dead Moon! Cool hey! Guy is in obscure one-and-done sixties garage band then goes on to form one of the most prolific and well-loved garage/punk/DIY bands of all time! Not that I'm saying Dead Moon are on everyone's shelf or anything but I've never met someone that didn't like 'em!

Anyway, lot's of goodness here. Great guitar playing, songs, jams and singing. Cole sounds fantastic too! Shades of what was to come with Dead Moon but also a singing style that at times sounds like Greg Sage... probably just a wee lad in Portland at the time but clearly he heard this before he started the Wipers.

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CRAIN- SPEED

Post-hardcore from Kentucky in the early 90's. Nothing more, nothing less. If you like Shellac then you'll dig it. Fierce drumming

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THE GOSLINGS- GRANDEUR OF HAIR

Today I went to my city's urban-center to buy some books my folks wanted for christmas. Aside from scoring a copy of Daniel Johnston's art-book for twenty bucks as well as the stuff I was looking for, it was pure hell. Masses of people all shuffling around, no one smiling, people shoving into other people while saying "excuse me" under their breath and not bothering to make eye contact, eyeing that bluray Friends boxset they can't wait to get their greasy little mitts on (sorry Grace!)... this time of year really does suck.

In a rare and unfortunate occurrence, I had no tunes to drown out the frenzy of "should I get an I-phone or a blackberry" but I kept thinking of this album for some reason. Maybe because it's some of the ugliest, sludgiest, creepo doom/drone I've ever heard and the thought of it blasting over some loudspeaker, thus making everyone in the store feel like jumping off of a bridge was very satisfying to me... ahhh the holidays. Anyway, The Goslings are from Florida, record all of their albums on cassette and never tour... sounds kinda douchey and hey, maybe they are but when the music is this perfect, I could care less. Imagine a not boring, more psychedelic Sunn O))) and you'll have a pretty good idea of what you're getting into.

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BEVIL WEB/3 DREAM BAG- SPLIT 7"

Oh yes, I just bought a copy of this gem from the guy who used to run the label back in '94! It's being mailed straight from Dayton, Ohio! To keep it short, this is a split 7" between two "bands" who's members are all just people from Guided by Voices. Curiously, Bob Pollard is absent from this entirely but it doesn't matter a bit. Side A, aka Bevil Web, is Tobin Sprout at his very best and side B, aka 3 Dream Bag, is material penned by Greg Demos... which is surprisingly great! If you're into golden era GBV or just lo-fi pop in general then get on this!

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SLOAN- ONE CHORD TO ANOTHER

If you're from Canada then you either a) don't like Sloan and have been forced to listen to them by every rock station and music-outlet in the country or b) really love Sloan and wish more people took the time to actually listen to their records! Obviously I'm a 'b'...

This is their third album and first big commercial album in Canada, probably because one of its singles went on to be a popular muchmusic video. Our national media has always supported this band and although those decisions often seem arbitrary (Nickelback anyone?) this is one of the few cases where the powers that be actually supported a bunch of really legit guys who just wanted to make power pop for ever and ever and ever and ever. If you like the sounds of Big Star filtered through some early 90's indie sensibilities then this is the ticket! Their previous outing, Twice Removed, is also phenomenal.

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BLACK FLAG- LOOSE NUT

I am posting this because I think it's still maligned as a shitty album by even some very serious fans but I am here to try and convince you otherwise! Now, Black Flag are great, obviously, but how long they stayed great is one of the most divisive arguments among fans. Me, I think this is it. This is truly the last great, yet awkward grasp at making a defining album that would cement the band's legacy.

Now obviously people consider Damaged or My War to be that defining album but hindsight is 20/20... I'm sure in 1984 when Ginn was writing this material that the notion of those albums going on to be anything more than blips on the radar was probably laughable and anyone who's read about Ginn knows that he loved the Grateful Dead way more than he ever liked punk... what came was a weird, boneheaded, proto-crossover album with some real tough sounding riffs and the usual awesomeness of 80's Rollins/Ginn. I guess he thought this would really push them to the next level. Instead it's really just the beginnings of their breakup. Why do people hate this album though? Because it sounds nothing like Black Flag! Maybe it's not as good as the classic material but hey, stop shitting on it. It sounds like a revelation when you listen to it after some of the later Bad Brains stuff...That is definitely not to say that on the right day, this album is exactly what you need! That day will likely involve a nice mixture of shitty weed, cheap beer, warm weather and a desire to not think at all...

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CASIOTONE FOR THE PAINFULLY ALONE- ANSWERING MACHINE MUSIC

This one is for my fellow wimps. If you like lo-fi pop songs that are sad as fuck then this is the shit. The one deterrent for a lot of people is this: the whole album is one shitty keyboard and one man who can barely sing. Why is it worthwhile? The caliber of songwriting here is incredible. The stories in these songs are so relatable and heartbreaking for anyone who's ever pined for someone who doesn't notice you, been dumped because you were an idiot or just felt like no matter what, you were going to die alone. Imagine GBV played by one guy in his room on a casio SK-1! Yeah, I know, "weak!" right? fuck off, I gots feelings and unfortunately Void doesn't really relate to all of them...

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NEIL YOUNG- AMERICAN STARS N' BARS

This is one of my favourite Neil Young albums and as far as I can tell, it's not really included in the cannon of his greatest albums. A damn shame really, as this is his best synthesis of country-balladry and drunken guitar-wailing. It was widely unavailable and fairly unknown for a long time because it was not transferred to CD or reissued after its 1977 release. Thankfully about eight years ago it was reissued alongside On the Beach and a few other not-so-greats...

Now people will tell you that On the Beach is his classic 'lost' album and the great minds over at pitchfork gave it a 9.5 rating, which didn't help the throngs of hipsters who immediately decided it was their faaaavourite Neil Young album... well those people don't know After the Gold Rush from Trans, maaaannnnn! This is the shit, trust me. Country-fried bummer jams for the weary soul. Tear in your beer shit

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THE WIPERS- FOLLOW BLIND

I know, I know. "only the first three Wipers albums are good!"... whatever. People who only like the first three records are like people who think 'TV Party' is Black Flag's best song. The Wipers first three records all sound different, have no significant similarities in the songwriting and I will never understand why people like to lump them together as the only good records the band ever made. Don't get me wrong, I adore Is This Real? and Over the Edge but the fourth, fifth and sixth records are actually more cohesive than Youth of America, an album marred by uneven songwriting yet consistently adored by people... definitely something wrong with me!

On to this gem. Follow Blind is the band's sixth album and boy, is this some sad, subdued and spooky shit. Sage definitely tones down the distortion and rage on this one and goes for a more introspective/DEPRESSED theme. His guitar playing really carries this one, whammy bar in full effect for those nice subtle dives... this is a perfect record for those days when you wake up and realize that no matter what you do that day, nothing will make you happy!

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ULVER- BERGTATT

Do you like Black Metal? There are two kinds of hipsters I often notice. Those who are unconsciously apolitical, buy everything aside from food at urban outfitters, exclusively listen to whatever currently occupies pitchfork's 'best new music' and go to more fashion blogs than music blogs. On the other side of the coin are hipsters who are very political (whether or not they know what they're talking about is irrelevant now,) try very hard to be weird in ominous ways (ironically dress like 90's goths, listen to Death in June or other bands that are of dubious morals,) post weird pictures on tumblr of suburban kids in knockoff Nike shirts that were taken with digital cameras made in 2001 and oh yeah... LISTEN TO BLACK METAL!

Sorry to all you kvlt bros out there but black metal has, for a long time now, been co-opted by hipsters and has officially become part of the how-to-be-instantly-cool cannon. Who is to blame? Vice and the internet obviously, but lets look at black metal itself...

Political? sure! it largely became prominent when it was the music genre of choice for young Norwegians eager to destroy the philosophical and moral tyranny that christianity had imposed on their country centuries before. Let's see... try very hard to be weird in an ominous way? wearing melted Kiss makeup and never smiling? sounds about right, and never mind listening to music of dubious morals, lots of black metal bands are just openly racist... to make the comparison easier, of course. Lastly, wanna know a good place to find weird, grainy photos? tumblr? No, try black metal album covers. Sorry to anyone still clinging to the idea that listening to black metal made you any kind of an individual that was immune to trend and culture...

But hey, it's fuckin' good music! Like this record from Ulver. Black metal meets pastoral goth-rock in the early 90's... yes please!

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